Aminals

I haven't really wanted my thoughts anywhere outside my head. They're safer there. Robert Redford said, "Knowing is easy, saying it outloud is the hard part," in The Horse Whisperer. I think lyrics are the only think I have that can say how I feel. From thought to paper. But lyrics stay in my head for this reason too.

I think this past month, I've questioned absolutely everything. Like really, everything about myself. I just don't even know or even know if I have the means of knowing. You know?
Everyone says I overthink and that I just need to let things be. Well, I can't.

Did you know that a bumblebee, aerodynamically, is unable to fly? But the bumblebee doesn't konw that. So it just flies anyways.

The turtle can survive all curled up in his shell, but to go anywhere, he has to stick his head out.

When I was 8, I bought two rings in Tulsa with my mom at a little ring shop. A bumblebee and a turtle. I didn't know I would be so influenced by these two creatures.

Everyone knows I've had a rough couple of years. Hell. Absolute hell. And sometimes I didn't want to survive it. I had it made up in my mind that I was in a closed jar.

I'm really good at pretending. When I'm out of the focused mindset, I'm free to smile. My reactions are unhealthy. What am I supposed to do?

Grief is somthing that has to be dealt with internally. Joy has to be shared to be enjoyed. Full potential.

Grief is a very important part of life. But you never are better for it. So I'm back on for 5 more months. And I refuse to date in those 5 months.

Boys are bad.

I need to be more like the turtle and the bumblebee!!

I had a really great day. Last night Robert and I saw Harry Potter 7 Part 2. I cried. He laughed at me. I hit him. He shut up.
Epic movie. I wanna see it again.

My birthday was absolutely wonderful btw. Thanks to all who came out and anyone that sent me a happy birthday wish.
I love you all. Each and every one.
-Amber

Psalm 100:5 For the LORD is good and his love endures forever; his faithfulness continues through all generations.